Church Point / Mona Vale NSW 2105Monday to Friday 8am to 6pmPh: 0417 462 115FB Logo1
Maarit Rivers, Child Therapist

Ph: 0417 462 115

Church Point / Mona Vale
NSW 2105

Monday to Friday 8am to 6pm

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Why a child may bully – no child is born this way

There are many reasons why a child may bully, but no child is born this way. Its cause is unfortunate learned behaviour that specialised therapy can change. A bully is also a victim. Intolerance, particularly towards difference, may have been instilled at home. Or at school. A bully may see ‘difference’ as being inferior. Alternatively, it can stem from not understanding a religion. Or likewise, not understanding media.

Why a child may bully – it has various causes

A bullying child often has underlining emotional difficulties

The bully often has low self-esteem, Furthermore, he/she may be depressed.

Bullying may assist conceal shame, and similarly anxiety.

The bullying may be a cover for insecurity.

Bullies typically seek to boost self-esteem. Abusing others makes them feel powerful.

A bully becomes angry quickly – generally lacking self-controlled behaviour.

The bully may do so as a result of being likewise bullied. This may be from other children. Or, for example, at home.

By bullying, the bully’s status might rise. In addition, bullies can create a false belief they are supported as a result of others watching.

Some bullies learn to charm adults despite their bullying tactics. Furthermore, they often lack empathy, compassion, remorse or shame. Many have such feelings deeply embedded. As a result it takes work and time to resolve.

Bullies may refuse responsibility for their actions. For example  “he was asking for it”, or “she deserves it.” If  bullying is unchecked, that child may eventually become a bullying adult. They have a high risk of criminality. They may also become domestically violent. Research shows a high risk of ending up in prison. To read my full article Click here.


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